NORTH ADAMS, Mass. — The Berkshires in recent years have been working to create a safe environment so people can be who they are and feel welcomed.

 

Transgender Day of Visibility on Friday, and the past week, set aside time to raise awareness of the resources available to support transgender people and create a discussion that will lead to a path of improvement. 

 

Several members of the transgender community shared their thoughts with us about what the day meant for them, how the community at large can be an ally and some of their own experiences in being transgender.

 

"So having a 'day of visibility' is, I think, about trying to celebrate and find ways for us to be fully members of the community," West Stockbridge resident and Berkshire Stonewall Community Coalition Treasurer Ray Garnett said. 

 

Transgender people have been part of the community all along. They are business owners and politicians, lawyers and doctors, teachers and students.

 

"I never want to say that we're not any different than your neighbor, we are your neighbor. We are different and we are your neighbor and that's a good thing. Encouraging and supporting differences in all of us is a good thing," LGBTQIA-plus advocate Justin Adkins, an educator and consultant, said.

 

Transgender people who feel uncomfortable coming out may seek alternative and unhealthy means to let out their built-up distress or discomfort, City Councilor Ashley Shade said 

 

Shade shared her experience coming out saying that being transgender was a very well-hidden secret. She played football and only had conversations around being transgender with a couple of people.

 

"It was something that was really hard for me to face and accept. Honestly, I thought I would lose a lot of friends. But I also had some personal things that I needed to deal with before I could even get to that point of accepting myself because growing up, I just buried everything deep down and I played football and I used football to get my aggression out," Shade said. 

 

"So I never actually really dealt with any of the issues that I was having growing up. I just kind of just buried everything. I used it as my motivation to play football, which it was great for, but it really wasn't a healthy way of trying to understand myself and who I wanted to be as a human being."

 

Shade is the first transgender woman in public office in Berkshire County, being elected in 2021.

 

"I think Berkshire County will continue to be a very visible, open and accepting community and I'm going to do everything in my power to keep it that way," she said. 

 

"I think Massachusetts is a state that can become a safe haven for the community, and should, and it is my personal mission to make sure that we do everything we can to protect people and give people a safe place to live."

 

Transgender rights are uncertain in parts of the nation with legislation — largely in conservative states — denying transgender individuals the resources, support, medical and gender-affirming care and even the language to describe their experiences. 

 

The American Civil Liberties Union is tracking 435 anti-LGBTQ bills in the United States. The Kentucky legislature just passed sweeping prohibitions to gender-affirming care over the governor's veto and protests by citizens, educators and doctors.  

 

Despite this Adkins is still optimistic about the future because although some adults are not being supportive, young people are being supportive of each other. 

 

"Loving environments, especially at home, and with your family is one of the best prevention tools to prevent to prevent suicide and trans folks. Right now, we're not seeing that across the country. We're seeing a lot of hatred and some very hateful laws being put into place. And not enough a lot of times because not enough people are standing up," Adkins said. 

 

"Here in Berkshire County, I have a ton of hope. I continue to have more and more people reach out about making sure that their workplace is supportive of trans and nonbinary people and making sure our health-care system is supportive of trans and nonbinary people, making sure that our organizations are nonprofit organizations especially that serve people of all ages are supportive of trans or nonbinary people so that I'm very hopeful here in Berkshire County."

 

What role do these bills being passed in some states play in the mental and physical health of the transgender community? 

 

Transgender individuals who do not have support from a friend or family are far more likely to become severely depressed to the point of suicide. 

 

A lot of these bills are making it difficult for parents of a transgender child to be there due to the criminalization of seeking support whether it’s getting them therapy, whether it be accessing the hormone blockers, Ray Garnett said.

 

Why is it important for a transgender person to see that visibility from a transgender activist? 

 

"I'll start with a bit about activism. So, not everyone is wired and this is not just for trans folks in general, not everybody is wired to be publicly fighting for the rights of anyone including themselves. As trans folks, we need to be fighting for our rights. We need allies to support us and come alongside us but we also need to be taken a lot of that lead and for those of us who are wired that way it's important. At least for me, that is something that I stand up for. And in some ways, some of the national work that I've done I stumbled into," Adkins said. 

 

In 2015, when he was arrested on the Brooklyn Bridge with 700 other people while protesting on the way banking and money in the United States was being handled. He was treated differently because he was transgender.

 

The work Adkins and his lawyer Andrea J. Ritchie did led to a historical moment when the "U.S. District Judge Jed Rakoff found that transgender people qualified as a 'quasi-suspect class' entitled to a 'more exacting standard of judicial review' for allegations of discrimination because of a history of persecution." More information on his advocacy work here. 

 

"I didn't want to be mistreated, for being trans and it happened and I kind of turned a lemon into lemonade. But, there's other trans folks, especially lawyers and other activists across the country who are continuing to fight and I continue to fight for our rights as trans people in the United States," he said. 

 

"I think it's important for other trans people to see that trans people are fighting for us, and that we're not completely dependent on and relying on non trans people to be leading that fight."

 

What does it mean to be visible or invisible?

 

"Both of those things can be double-edged because being visible can mean being able to openly and wholly and fully live your life, not just both as an individual and as a member of the community and that's really wonderful. It can sometimes feel like making yourself a target, I think or making yourself open to all kinds of reactions. It can both be negative reactions," Garnett said. 

 

Being visible can also open up to "overly fawning" where individuals talk about a transgender person in their life which is confusing to react to. 

 

"But then of course, being invisible can have two sides as well. When it's a secret, it can feel really painful and difficult but sometimes, you should be allowed just to have privacy in your life," Garnett said. 

 

"So it's always trying to have the balance between being able to be visible in a way that allows you to be fully yourself and fully a member of a community and also being allowed to have privacy and too often we get the other side of both of those things. Which is having to hide yourself and not participate." 

 

How can people be better allies to the transgender community?

 

The best way to be a better ally is to have an open mind and be curious. Take the first steps to educate yourself on the topic by reading online about transgender people or reach out to a person, Garnett said. 

 

"I think a lot of times people who would like to be allies are sometimes tentative, because they're concerned about saying the wrong thing or doing the wrong thing. But honestly, an attitude of openness of care and curiosity goes a very long way," he said. 

 

It is OK to make mistakes that is normal, Garnet added. "We just ask people to keep listening and keep talking, and that way you build relationships and that's what it's really all about is building relationships and building community."

 

Allies should also stand up for transgender people when they are not present to do so themselves. You don't have to be a "vigilante" about it, just calmly correct the person who used the wrong name or pronoun, Adkins said. 

 

What advice would you give to a transgender person who is not out yet? 

 

"I would say, it's always a difficult decision on when you should have come out but it is my personal belief that all human beings no matter who they are, or where they're from, should be able to live their lives in a way that is authentic to themselves, and makes them happy and as long as they're not hurting other people, they should be able to do that at anytime, anywhere," Shade said.

 

She encourages people to always be true to who they are because "at the end of the day you only have one life to live and nobody else can make you happy." 

 

"So, if you're not being authentic to yourself, you're making your life so much more difficult than it really needs to be. That just eats at you and eats at you until eventually you break and I don't want anyone to break the way I did," she said. 

 

Massachusetts is one of the safest places where transgender people can come out, even in Berkshire County there are resources, Shade added. 

 

"If you need help, reach out. I will help you find the resources you need and I have so many other people who will as well. We have a big support group, and a big supportive community here that will help you if you need help. So help is always here." Garnett said. 

 

After posting a video about Transgender Week of Visibility, Adkins was asked how do you explain what transgender is to kids? 

 

"The answer to that is that we have to explain to everyone about everyone's bodies, and that we need to be supportive of everyone and their bodies. So we need to be supportive of fat people and skinny people, black people, brown people, white people, we need to be supportive of trans people and intersex people, which is totally different, and cis people or non trans people," he said.

 

"We all should have access to all of the same resources and support and we should be supported in the sense of not being made fun of or discriminated against. That's what's happening at all levels right now. That's what's happening. You know, that's what happens to trans people but it's not just us.

 

"You know, that's what happens to trans people but it's not just us. We put these different values on what bodies are OK and what bodies are not OK, and we need to stop doing that. That's how we can all be supported, and all feel good. And being able to be like out or not out, however we want to, and it wouldn't be a problem if we were supporting each other as humans. That's what we need to be doing."